Journal by a Transition House Women's Support Worker

I was just putting together a proposal for an awareness campaign I would like to hold for the first time in my community. It is called the Clothesline Project and I encourage anyone to check out what it is all about through the website www.clotheslineproject.org. The project raises awareness around violence against women and provides a healing experience for the women. Anyone can hold a Clothesline Project in their community, it doesn't require a lot of resource or funds and has a profound impact.

To prepare the proposal I had to put together some statistics. They still shock me and tears come to my eyes. I am reminded of the Robert Pickton trial, and the still unsolved attacks on BC's northern Highway of Tears: Highway 16 which runs from Prince Rupert to Prince George, where more than 32 aboriginal women have disappeared; some found murdered and assaulted.

I find myself quoting Statistics Canada, "Every minute of every day, a Canadian woman or child is being sexually assaulted". "One to two women are murdered by a current or former partner each week in Canada" and I am overcome with sadness. When you work in a Transition House these statistics have faces. They are mothers, daughters, children, sisters and grandmothers. They are the women I have tea with, chat with and sit with while they cry. The statistics represent people, with stories and hopes and dreams. They represent a little girl playing barbies on the carpet. They say that when this work stops breaking your heart is when it is time to stop doing it and so I am grateful for the emotion. I still feel driven to be a part of providing these women with safety.

It brings to mind a picture I saw in the newspaper yesterday. It was of one of our former residents, standing in a group, as a part of a volunteer program. I was overjoyed to see her and I stared at the picture for a long time. In her face, her clothes, her posture, I searched for clues, insights into her story. Trying to piece out how she might now be doing from this static image. I wondered is she well, is she safe, has she gone back to him or she on her own, is she lonely or is she building a life for herself out of the isolation he imposed on her? She was a woman who had lived in this small community all her life and yet lost contact with so many because of his terrifying violence and intimidation.

Her particular situation made it very difficult for her to be safe or to leave, her home of more then 20 years. A home she had herself bought and worked hard to pay the mortgage on, despite being a single mother. So while successfully raising her daughter to adulthood, by herself, she made every mortgage payment until twenty something years alter she owned her very own home. Her whole life is tied up in that house and yet, due to a short term - yet very violent relationship - she is no longer safe there.

Her ex-boyfriend is a frightening man. She is not the only women we have had seek safety from this particular abuser. Previously a police officer in another country, so trained with firearms, and viciously violent, we are frightened for her safety. Our service was essential for this particular woman. We worked with her and her post traumatic stress disorder and other trauma and tried to build her self esteem. I do believe she is doing well now. I do hope so, and I will always think of her when I remember how valuable the work we do is.