snapshots......

I have been working in women's shelters now for 16 years. I have seen alot and experienced alot. I would like to share a few snapshots of over the years.....

- One day a five year old little girl asked me "Can you tell me why my daddy's an angel on the outside of my house and a devil on the inside of my house?"

- One night while doing a group meeting on types of abuse, I was asking women to brain storm different forms of physical abuse. From the corner, in a small voice we all heard "is using a cow prod on you, physical abuse?"

- I was stopped in the grocery store by an ex-resident, who said to me that she will never forget me. I thought to myself....wow - I must have really had an impressive counselling session with her. :) She then went on to tell me why. She had five children in the shelter with her and was run ragged all the time. She said that one night, she went to bed exhausted, unable to complete her mountain of laundry. When she woke up in the morning, all her laundry was done and folded. I had never given it another thought. To me it meant nothing - to her it meant much more. Now I try to pay more attention to the "little things".

- I had met a certain woman in my first few years of working in the shelter. She shared alot with me, there are no words to describe the horrors she had survived from the age of four to adulthood. I remember thinking how could someone live through all of this? I watched her as she began to recognize the lies she had been told, and watched as her eyes began to fill with light as she started to take hold of her worth. A couple years later, she called the shelter and I answered the phone. She told me with great pride in her voice, that she had enrolled in a counselling course. She said that she wanted to use her past to help reach others who were hurting. I know it's not professional to cry on the job.......but a few tears escaped that day.

Sometimes when I tell people that I work in a shelter for abused women, they reply with "Aww those poor women, they must be so fragile". I always respond with "No, actually they are some of the strongest people I know. - these are people who will love through any circumstance, who are fiercely loyal, and have some of the greatest survival instincts I have seen.", and once they turn these wonderful qualities inward and start loving themselves more, they rise up out of the muck and mire to blossom just like a lotus.

Kathleen
Women's Counsellor